Spill the Beans….

I sit here at my new home, a coffee shop “Spill the Beans” just down the road from the house. Not sure on how long this one will last but it is so warm and cozy. The coffee is good and the free Wifi is a life saver, considering I no longer have “free” Internet at home. This weekend has been good, spent Friday night with the girls and watched some movies. The sun never made it’s way out on Saturday and it was cold, but we still managed to have a descent day.

knights2_webWent over to a friends house and chilled for a little while. We took the girls out the the Maritime Museum were they had the Knights of the Black Flag on display, and than out for fudge. Oh and hot chocolate,  jeez they have it made I would like to say.

Went to religious classes and then mass this morning. It was a great class today, we are in the process of learning about the Sacraments and the steps towards Baptism.  Life seems to work itself out and this process just gives me hope that I can live my life better and teach my kids the same. I have to learn to just sit back and let life go. Take it one day at a time, live every moment to the best that I can and smile because whatever happens happens. I can accept the way things are and not get lost in the thought of trying to change them. “If it’s meant to be it’s meant to be”.

I am all caught up with my on line classes, also I am trying to work ahead as much as possible so I don’t get behind. The classes are going well and I haven’t had any kind of trouble so far.  It’s getting to be about that time now and I’m getting tired, it has been a long day and I am in need of a much needed nap. I can here my nice warm bed calling my name as I sit here with my eyes half way shut. Another weekend is over and a whole new week is about to start. I can’t wait until it starts to warm up and I can get back out to the beaches and enjoy some much needed down time with friends. I might even consider going out to Bear Island and roughing it for a little while or even to Ocracoke not sure, many choices. It all has to do with timing and of course “MONEY”.  Money is always the key..

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The girls will be spending a month in Indiana this summer with their dad so I’m in the planning stage for that and haven’t decided yet on what I will be doing. I will be taking a couple more classes on line, but since they are on line I can go anywhere (almost) and not worry about missing any classes. So whether it be just staying here or going to some far away place it will be great to not have to worry and just let my mind go for at least a little while.  It’s time for me to go, can’t stay awake much longer.. Going to cook some chicken this evening for dinner so I have to be on my toes for that.

Until next Time.. Always remember to SMILE    🙂

Realization!!!!…

100_2646I’ve come to a realization today. I realized that until this day I did not know how much church and the christian faith would affect me. I found myself racing back to church so I would not miss Sunday mass, knowing that if I did I would feel an emptiness all day. At this point I’m not quite sure on how to explain this but in time I know I will. Me and my girls are on a new road in life, a very good one I should say. I’m at a different place in my life now. I feel myself growing and even though I have a lot of tough times ahead, I can rely on my friends, family and now I can trust in God for guidance. I sit here and write this and still feel amazed at what I am saying. We are learning about the Catholic traditions and the sacraments, among so many different things. I had quite a few questions answered for me today and it has lifted my spirits just to be able to know these things for the first time. I have a very special friend of mine that has pointed me in this great direction in life. Whether God has put him there for this purpose or another I don’t know, but living each day as it comes and knowing God is becoming a part of who I am and who my kids will be is a blessing in disguise. I’m very thankful on the path that I have chosen and I would not have changed anything.

31It’s been a long and slow weekend. Julia and Michelle have been sick pretty much the whole weekend , so we have been playing games and watching free episodes of Smallville on line (Love the Internet). Yes I’m a Smallville fanatic, I have been without cable for almost a year now, which I can honestly say it has been great. Well, except for football, nascar and Smallville. 🙂 I’m now sitting here, the girls have had dinner (my famous chili) and I, well typing away telling my life’s story. My mother asks me why in the world do I tell everyone in God’s creation about my life. I simply say, it is a release. I’m not here to ramble and whine about my life just to express it in a way that is most effective for me. My feelings tend to stay within me and that in return causes me great stress. If someone wants to read this fine, comment on this fine, I’m OK with it. My true friends know who I am and what kind of person I am and will always be. I will always change but for the good I hope.

ssa_logo2 So with that said, I also sent out both of my applications this weekend to kick start my new future.. My application for ECU and the application for the Wachovia Education Program through ECU. This program will start in the fall this year. Also, the girls joined the Swansboro Soccer Association and will be starting practice probably toward the end of the month. They have been playing soccer and baseball, softball since they can walk. This is just something else to keep me busy, they wanted to play and I’m not going to say no. So this weekend has been slow, but productive. I will continue to read and learn more about the Catholic Church and await the day that me and my girls will be brought into a new life and another new beginning. I look forward to what ever this new year and new path will bring.

I leave this evening with a verse that I have uncovered along the way to a newer and brighter future. April will be a true turning point in our lives, in more ways than one.

God is love, and those who live in love, live in union with God and God lives in union with them. I John 4:16

And so when we open our heart to another, we open it to God as well

Food for thought… 🙂

Beach Fun….

It’s Monday evening and I have just finished up with dinner. This past weekend was a busy weekend and this week has started off busy as well. I’ve been working hard on this new path of mine. I went down to Wilmington today to take the Praxis test, which I now have to wait for the results to come in in about three weeks. Friday night was spent working on my classes and getting settled into the blackboard. Saturday night, Charlie came over with his dirt bike and messed around on it while I went out for a little relaxation.

100_2619 Sunday was the first day of religious classes for me and the girls and it went pretty well. Sunday evening was filled with celebrating a birthday and eating a fabulous dinner.  It’s nice to kick back and relax with some great company and enjoy walking on the beach and having fun.

Girls enjoyed themselves and I can only hope that I can have more weekends to just sit back and not have to worry. Sooner or later I know they will come and in the mean time  I will continue to try to free my mind once Friday’s get here.

100_2614Michelle Being Michelle…

It Has Begun!!……

newcameras72I spent the last day of the break relaxing, going to church, and taking my girls out to shoot with their new 35mm cameras. I also was very thankful for a great vacation, even though short I think I had so much time to just sit and think about what path I am ready to venture on. church

The first week of January has begun. I have been on the go since 9 a.m. and still going. So many things rolling through my head, school, work, kids, faith, life ect…. Never seems to end. I feel like I never even had a break, although as great as it was and as much as I didn’t want it to end we all have to get back to the real world I guess. I sit here and think of how much I have done to get to this point. The things that I think I want, I work so hard for just to turn around and do something completely different, because it’s the most economical thing to do at the time. As for work I’m still working part time and very very thankful for all the support and help that I am given. Kids, well kids will be kids, they know exactly what buttons to push and let me tell you, they like to push them. Life, as for right now “One day at a time”, who knows. My way of thinking is that if what you do now makes you content and less likely to fall into despair than keep doing it. Life is a mystery and things change, people change, times change, change is inevitable. Church, I have made a big step into my religious faith as well as with my girls. The girls are now enrolled in religious classes with St. Mildreds  as I in RCIA classes in Swansboro. We have been going to Sunday mass for about a couple of months now and are enjoying it. Big step I think, I’m pretty nervous not sure why, maybe it’s because it’s a “change”, like I said change is inevitable.

rain72School, now I’m trying to get into the teaching program to pursue an elementary teaching degree which will hopefully grow into teaching art and so on. This is also a big step considering all the ideas and paths I have taken to get this far has turned into something out of the ordinary for me. Which means I must continue on another path but will still keep my main goal in focus as I look forward to the finish line, continuing to learn as much as I can along the way. Photography is what I know, everything along the way is just another journey, a journey that I can hopefully one day say, it was well worth all the frustration and constant hours of reading, studying, fighting for time for me, fighting time for the girls, and friends, ect…

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How I wish life could be so simple as a great dinner at Howards Pub or a nice walk on the beach or even some simple time to just sit back and read a book. Every now and than we all have those moments and it’s those moments that keeps us going. Keeps us craving for more of those special moments that seem to set our soul free even for just that brief and unique second.

🙂

2009 is here!!!!!!!!!

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Swansboro NC Sunset.

2009 is here! I hope everyone had a safe and eventful New Year. I picked up my girls Wednesday night and we brought in the new year by playing guitar hero, games and reading until 12 rolled around. We all crawled into bed after that and slept in the following morning. I would like to say that it is nice to have them home, it felt so empty without them here. We have a couple of packages to pick up tomorrow and that will be it for the gifts. The Christmas tree will come down this weekend and will be put away until December. 2008 has come and gone, now we look to a new year and hope for the best. There were many great things that this past year has brought. I graduated and now working on getting by Bachelors. My little brother has a little girl who by the way shares Julia’s birthday. My next to youngest brother Charlie has a great job and has a steady relationship that is going very well. My sister just got engaged and is very excited, she deserves to be happy. My family is doing well and I wish them the very best in this new year. My nephew and his wife just had a little girl right before the new year, so congrats to them. AS For me.. I look to 2009 for a new start on things. I have been blessed with so many things, that 2008 has not been all that bad, considering the circumstances.

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I sit here this morning waiting for my coffee to finish up, thinking about the days ahead. Work starts on Monday, I have to search for another part time job, which is a lot harder than I had presumed it to be. I will be starting all my applications for school trying to get everything in motion to see where I will be when fall rolls in. My views has changed somewhat with what I want to do and what I need to do. Not because I’ve changed my mind but because this is the most economical and sensible route to take. I love photography and everything about it, so with that said my mind is still set on getting a Masters but how I get there will be a rough road.

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Happy New Year To All!!!!

🙂