I have finally started on my new portfolio project. “Becoming a Thing of the Past“…. I’m slowly but surely working my way forward. Knowing how much the internet has changed our lives, and how much we all revolve around our computers and gadgets, how many people can honestly say that they receive handwritten letters in the mail. The true meaning behind a written letter means so much more than an email or text message because of the effort and time spent in writing it.
Our communication had to be limited to the written word. But, oh, how those words warmed our hearts over the months ahead and readied our souls for an understanding of each other that might never have been possible otherwise.
It’s early Saturday morning, wet, windy and cold outside, and I’m in bed waiting for my coffee. Michelle is up and already playing the playstation games, Julia is still in bed. Dogs are in the kitchen staying dry from the wind and rain outside which has prevented us from going to Wilmington for the JDRF Walk. I chose not to go because the girls don’t need to be walking in the rain and cold, we can always do another walk when it comes around again. I have been pretty busy with the kids and work these past couple of weeks. It seems to me that my life is still a work in progress, when you think everything is on the right path something comes and makes you rethink the road you are on. I’m not saying that Im not happy, I am but happiness isn’t forever and as much as you want something to stay in your life it sometimes tends to slowly push it’s way out. On the other hand I have learned that if you want something bad enough you wait for as long as it takes. I have two kids that I love dearly but sometimes wonder if I’m doing the right thing for them. I have friends that I try to stay in touch with as much as possible. Going on seven months of being on my own, which is a good feeling (sometimes). My lease runs out in April, and my divorce will be final, so that is the month that I will decide if I stay or go. If I stay, I’m going to start school again and get on my way to my bachelors and masters, if I go same-thing only in a new place to start over. Not sure right now what is best for me and the girls. I know they miss their dad and that is understandable, but I need to move on and get myself back on track, I feel as though I am in limbo just waiting for April to come around. I’m trying so hard to keep everything in perspective, which by the way I hate that word. The economy is terrible these days but at least for now the gas prices are decreasing. My family is doing well, they are making their own jewelry-and going to festivals almost every weekend, this is keeping them busy. My youngest brother is still in Washington taking care of his new baby girl and my other brother is working hard as normal. He has a girlfriend and they are doing good as well. Who said life was a bed of roses?… 🙂
I like to think that I’m doing ok with what I have to work with. Of course I’m still trying to find another job to compensate for the extra things I need. As long as I can keep my head above water and not let myself sink I’m going to be ok. I have friends, family, and all the support I need, which sometimes I tend to run from.. go figure…. I find myself waiting for the sunrise every-morning to see what the day might bring. Wondering if I will be able to spend some time with the ones I love or if I will have to wait, I wonder if I will be able to hang on just a little longer and not give up and just run away.
Halloween is next week and I’m not sure where the girls are going trick-or-treating yet. I have a wedding rehearsal that night and than we can go either into Morehead or back into Swansboro..Who knows, guess have to wait and see how the weather is and how other things turn out. I took the girls to their fall festival last night and they had a good time. It was different though I’m used to taking them around to different areas, this time they walked around with their friends and I just tagged along.. (Weird Feeling).. I guess they have to grow up sometime.. (they are still babies though). I have a long way to go with them and even though their dad is always there for them I know that I’m going to be the one that brings the stability. I’m not saying he is a bad dad, he is a great dad and well it is what it is.Enough rambling I have to get breakfast started, they are STARVING!!!.. I just hope in time they can appreciate all that I’m trying do do for them and myself. It’s not easy to be alone. I also hope that whomever is in my life knows that the kids will always be apart me. They have a dad who loves them and will be there for them, so I hope that they don’t scare people away. 🙂
I’m a pretty happy go lucky person, down to earth and don’t need a lot of pampering (although it is nice at times)…OK I said I had to go.. I’m going now.. This is addicting…
Until Next Time… Always Remember to SMILE 🙂
Well this time last year we were all headed to Savannah for the Regional SPE Conference. This year it is in Asheboro NC, (closer). I remember Savannah like it was yesterday and I can’t believe that it has been a year now, so much has changed since than. My life has been twisted and turned upside down and now I’m back on my feet and happier than I have been in such a long time. Roxanne is in J-ville now, Kim is married, Tina is moving, Lacey is well Lacey, Renne is still in Savannah, me (long story) 6 months separated, have my kids and on my way to recovery… Looking good though. Patrick is still teaching away and is on his way to doing something different here in the near future. So with all that said, I’m ok and I have a lot to be thankful for even though it gets rough at times. I have friends, family and my girls…
Due South Juried Book is out.
LIFE IS GOOD!!!!!
I couldn’t pass this up… So… funny 🙂
It’s Friday and the day that I have to say goodbye to Diezel. I’m happy and sad at the same time, but I know this is best for him he needs a family that will give him all the attention that he needs. It will take some time for me and my other dog Jaucie to adjust to him being gone. The girls will be ok, my heart aches knowing that he won’t be here to greet me when I get home.. But this is the best thing for him and that is all that I am thinking about.
It will be ok in the long run, Jaucie can get the attention that she deserves and Diezel as well. Saying goodbye is never easy.
We will always love you Diezel……..
Saying goodbye doesn’t mean anything. It’s the time we spent together that matters, not how we left it. — Trey and Matt Stone Parker
This weekend went well, weather was beautiful and the Seafood Festival was in full swing.The traffic was
Photo by Dylan Ray
horrible and the prices were outrageous but that goes with the territory of these kind of things. The girls enjoyed themselves while riding the rides and me viewing from the sidelines. I can’t quite keep up with all the rides that go in circles these days, maybe it’s the old age :). I love the roller coasters though, but anything else is way too much. It was nice to get out and see them enjoy everything and have fun.
Photo by Dylan Ray
It was fun and it wasn’t too cold, food was good and the atmosphere was actually quite. Not too many people out for the first night, I also had great company with me. There was-nothing that I would have changed except prices.$$$$$$
On Saturday we went out and watched the 2008 Twin Bridges 8K Road Race. It was great to see so many people come out and take part is this race.
There were refreshments afterwards to include ice cold beer. Some took advantage of the refreshments and hung out to relax and catch their breath. They had tables set up with bananas, grapes, water and gatorade. The race was full of ages ranging from the ones who preferred to be pushed to the ones who preferred to push themselves. Fathers, daughters, sons, moms, dads, brothers, sisters ect….
Not all of the people were running today, some were just relaxing and enjoying
the weather while it lasts. But all in all it was a good weekend. We have a long weekend coming up with the fall break kicking in. Probably just hang out at house and try to enjoy the time off.