One day at a time…..

One Day at a time is what we all need to remember. Life is so short and we take for granted all the beauty in just one day.  I’ve learned so much about myself these past couple of years and how I can talk more about what I’m feeling instead of keeping it inside, which  I’m pretty sure I get that from my dad, and my emotions run rapid when they do finally come out, and that is from my mom.

Looking to the Skies

I have started to go to church on Sundays, which is a big change for me. I was raised by two fabulous parents, which both are Catholic and very cynical at times. We were not raised in the church nor were we pressured at anytime to believe in any particular way. Church was very prominent in our area of Mansfield Arkansas, we were right in the middle of the bible belt and had a variety of faiths to explore. I myself have tried to find my way, and maybe I haven’t tried hard enough. I believe that you should have faith and know that there is something greater out there that is bigger than you or I.  My kids are starting to ask questions and to tell you the truth I really have no answers. So with that coming about, we will learn together and I will not pressure them into doing something they don’t want to. What I have learned by growing up around friends that were pressured into the whole church scene, they became more rebellious and more apt to get into trouble later on down the line.  So pressure is not what I’m all about. Can’t wait to see how excited they get to learn new things. 

                                      

  Water Spout Forming Near Yacht Club

Went out this weekend to just relax and have a good time. Caught a glimpse of a water spout forming out above the water in Swansboro. I have never seen one in person so I can mark that off my list of things to see in my lifetime.. Hey I’m doing pretty well with my list. 🙂

My mom’s birthday is Monday and well mine is on Tuesday… go figure. Life just seems to work itself out. Brought my baby home today. A three year old mixed breed, very strangely put together dog. (Shepard, Pit-bull, and Husky) What a combo.


So now I have my girls and Jaucie. Not sure if that is a good combo for dating.. I guess I will see. Like I said before we are a packaged deal, and they mean the world to me. So…… My weekend has been pretty good, Tuesday night I will officaly move the girls in and we will be together again. 

My goal is to  the best that I can by my girls and make them as happy as I can. Teach them that life is not perfect and that happiness is always out there don’t search for it, it will come to you. I have some trouble on that subject everynow and then but, with good faith, loving friends and family we will survive. 🙂

The family.  We were a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another’s desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together.  ~Erma Bombeck

 

Emptiness….


          I stand here, looking at a home that once was full of laughter at some times and tears at others. A home that was built on the idea that it would stand the test of time, and that it would take an act of nature to tear it apart. Though nature did not tear this home apart, it was human nature that drove the occupants in a different direction. Although love is still present it is not the same love that was brought into it to begin with. I’m without words, and I see years of hard work  slip away with every item that is sold. Pieces of me and of him and of the girls. I know that this part of my life is over and things just wasn’t meant to be. There were some fantastic times and I will never forget them, and even though he and I are moving on he will remain in my life forever. He is the father of the two most amazing girls in my life.        They give me strength to move on and to try to remain strong and steadfast. It’s in them that I survive. Knowing that all the material things in life are nothing compared to the love that everyone deserves and the love that they give me is keeping me sane. 

 

 

    The house is almost empty and it’s coming to an end. Life is so precious and unpredictable and in order to look forward you need to at least recognize the past. Remember the good times and cherish them, keep them close because those times are a part of who you are.Than you can move forward and make new memories and more good times. I’m trying  to keep a positive attitude, and smile in times of heart ache. I guess it’s easier said than done, but yet I’m still trying. The girls will be starting a new school in the fall and hopefully they can adjust with no problems. I’m sure it will be harder for me than them. With my school coming to an end I find myself searching for my way into this hectic world. I have the most amazing friends anyone could ask for and I will remain by their side as they are on mine. Looking out the window in my new place of almost 4 months now, I keep hearing my grandmother and mother tell me “This to shall pass”. And then I ask the question, how long do I have to wait for it to pass? Does anyone know the answer to this mystery of a question, if so please do tell. And so as I wait for it all to pass I can only hope for the best for Tim. I wish him all the luck, love and everything else that I know he will find out there. As for me, again always a struggle and will never be perfect by no means but I will always and forever strive to smile.

Camera Phone Amazement…..

Ok so camera phones aren’t great but I recently downloaded a picture from mine and even though it was small it still was good enough for the web. I can get probably a 4×6 print at a resolution of about 266. Not too bad I was pretty amazed. Here is the photo that I captured. Although I’m not sure how much downloading this photo straight to my computer actually costs, I will experiment more. 🙂

Happiness often sneaks in through a door you didn’t know you left open…. Drew Barrymore

Down to the Wire…..

 

It’s almost over, coming down to the last two weeks. I can’t hardly beleive that I’m graduating once again, and I find myself asking the same question. What do I do now? The obvious answer is get a JOB!!. I have so much more to offer now and yet I want more.  More is good, because you can never stop learning. Life can go by so fast, and honestly I tend to move right along with it. I have to learn to slow down and except everything that comes my way. 

I gues I just need to sit back do wha I have to do, have fun, live, love, laugh, and be with the ones who matter most. This chapter of my life is not quite over, it’s only beginning and I hope that the friends that I have made along my journey remain with me always. 

Until Next Time… Take Care and….. Keep Smiling 🙂

 

In a Perfect World……..

                 Miss You Mel. Be Strong…

     It’s amazing to me that in one instant your life can change forever. Wether it is for the good or bad it changes. Just here recently a good friend of mine was in a motorcycle accident. I find myself praying more and wanting do more with the life that I have. If there is something that I want do and I have the means to do it, I will. Life is too short to put things on hold if you can do them today. I’ve found that true friendship has more meaning to it than I could ever imagine. Friendship is vital to ones spirit, health, love, life and everything else that comes along the way. 

 

                    This was the first year that I had spent the 4th pretty much on my own. Spent some time at the Pub, visiting with everyone and than headed home for the evening. Tim has the girls up until 28th, which is when he leaves for Indiana.

       In a perfect world everything would be exactly the way I would want it, but I believe that noone can be perfect. Although the 4th wasn’t what I had imagined it to be, the weekend ended very well. Spent some quality time with a close friend of mine which made the 4th seem just like another day. It’s quiet at home and I sit once again with nothing but me and the computer to keep my mind from wondering. Yes I’ve only been alone for a little while but it hits fast and when you least expect it. Think I might go out to the Pub and eat some lunch, come back and work on my daughters baseball book,

than maybe try to take a nap. Probably cook up some chili tonight have some (ROOM TEMP) Merlot 🙂  and watch a movie..

One of the most tragic things I know about human nature is that all of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon–instead of enjoying the roses that are blooming outside our windows today.